Relational Psychosis

My heart bleedeth. Continually I am reminded of my lowliness, a stench of poverty. My Inadequency, they around me invalidate me on a daily. Insignificant I feel invisibile. it aches that I fade that mine light is dimmed in the eyes of my loves. In my soul I wrestle. My Spirit fights to free itself from the lusts of this world. The cravings of the eyes toss it to and from, Trickery hath been my portion deciet my choicest meal from the shadows of death. Its as though the constants of my world revolve around a dark soul. A soul so dat i cant grasp ir. As though my life holds on in its clows. They are conniving and evil yet wear a smile of good intent, their demenor, though seemingly harmless, carries a stench of death and seeks after man's very soul. Again I ache bt yet go unnoticed. Dessolation, rejection and the pain of emotional lonliness blurs my eyes. I cant fight, i cant breathe. I am intoxicated by them, their trade is seduction a cold play and lifeless relation. I seek my God to save me from my stupor, a pit of quick sand quickly swallows me and nothing to hold onto. The pain is as of a knife in one's loins, a dagger in the heart and on grows stronger by the minute. Where is my help oh Lord. I have lost my stremgth and in this moment art thee strongest. Under my skin they crawl like vermin with spikes for shells. They establish themselves in my stream by my validation and stir the pain of a wasp's sting. I know not how to overcome save to deny myself of the baseline. I wait on you oh Lord. Rescue me from this agony. Spare mine family and kids from the repurcussions. Raise not my children with this intent of dependence which feels like toxic empathy that just draws in all vampires. They suck my reserves empty, they leave me empty for they give nothing...nothing at all. ....Like a fix for a moment my body secretes toxins i have no dream to possess. It hurts, damn, damn, it stings, I long to scream for i am starved by the very thing that killeth me. Lived recklessly to appease a reptilia and sold bits of me.It is a strange pain this one. My faith is that in this moment oh Lord, when all human will hath failed and nothing works in my strength, I look to you for you alone are the source of my help. Work in me, speak to me, hold my hand and change my desires. Curb my cravings, tame rants and quiet my spirit Oh Lord,for my heart gives all unto thee.

Contempt

We resent those that are our superiors, we get angry with those our level but hold in contempt those we dim lower than us! Its all a mix of disgust & anger the definition differs with whom its directed to. THERE MUST NEVER BE CONTEMPT in a relationship or marriage, only ANGER. For if one holds their spouse in contempt, it simply means they feel they are doing the other a favour to love them!!!! Mathmatically, this the LCM of a dying relationship. If you cannot honor and respect the one you love and call dear,....you are the only person you are lying to! In the book Blink: The Power of Thinking Without Thinking, author Malcolm Gladwell discusses John Gottman's theories of how to predict which couples will stay married. Gottman's theory states that there are four major emotional reactions that are destructive to a marriage: defensiveness, stonewalling, criticism, and contempt. Among these four, Gottman considers contempt the most destructive of them all.

Barren love

I have now clearly learned that the pains of one without beauty are as that of a barren woman! For though she can bare no children, nature's course imposes the burden of menstruation upon her like she were fertile...and so it goes with an unattractive being, even with their undesirable disposition, they still fall in love like any other and sadly have theirs eternally unreciprocated!

For a man

For a man to claim he is not loved or even harbor the mere thought of inadequacy is to look God straight in his face and say, "Hey, I know you love me and wish well for me but frankly, this whole thing is a lie." We normally feel this way when we are betrayed probably in relationships or turned down at a job interview, a break up, divorce and even when struck with extreme poverty.

We begin to question the reality of his love and its credibility for to us, we are certain, he has shut his ears to our pleas and sees not our tears. In my world, I would term this as a faithless life. Just as spending a night in the garage does not make one a car, being bombarded with painful emotional seasons, empty pockets and comments that dent your inner being leaving you crashed does not make you any less a child of God.

I learned from a friend once who never allowed the love orchestrated by mortal man to define her moments of joy nor waver her faith in God. She would never let her heart be broken by a man nor would she let herself date anyone if she had no intention of marrying them. All this while I thought to myself, of course with a mind corrupted by the worldly views, how can one make it in life without the intimate love that exists between a man and a woman. I looked all around and the only babes and or dudes who looked closest to happiest were the ones dating, at least then. Probably I can say I was not mature enough because now I understand how that beloved friend of mine managed to beam with so much joy that seemed to show a deep sense of satisfaction derived from understanding that the Love that Lord has for each one of us supersedes that of our parents, our brethren and most of all spouses.

If only our teens and 'twentegers' could grasp this, we would not be having all these multiple and quantitative relationships (between 5-9 dates) before one settles for marriage all in the name of looking for love. Not that this whole concept is of no gain but that we clearly understand, no love of man can ever fill your heart for it will always lack in a way...may be then we could also be able to appreciate our spouses better.

The love we look for in a man/woman can not, and will never replace the Love God has for us, a failure to acknowledge this will leads us to expect miracle working spouses in the arena of Love.Haha

The beauty of a woman!

Oh how beautiful art thee. Created in all splendor and glamor. The female of all species is nothing less than the most beautiful creation of all times. If words could do it better, may be we would all call our spouses by one word...beautiful! But look around you, based on what she does best have we chosen to name them...honey for those that always put more sugar than required in your tea, sweet heart for they that have a longing for candy, darling for those that faithfully execute the chores, dentist for those that relentlessly empty thy pockets and the list is endless. None the less, a woman is a beauty.

But hey wait a minute...More women down here on earth are deceived by their beauty than men are.!

Ladies can testify, record upon record on men they have met that practically lust and or crave for them courtesy of their outlook and yeah, I must say men find it hard to draw a line between LOVE & LUST as the latter takes precedence most of the time!Then outward beauty of a woman is most deceptive.To a man, upon seeing her, it seems like that is all he has ever needed...the body whose silhouette the moonlight worships, the flawless skin, the perfectly defined curves and all, not to forget the killer smiles and hypnotizing scents..etc.

Enough of the praise and worship, back to reality...why this beauty deceives the ladies more than the men is because they tend to focus on keeping up appearances, wear endless layers of makeup, spend nights perfecting their hair do and editing their nails like their lives depend on it for the PRAISE & WORSHIP from the viewers is worth more than the actuality of her innermost being. Certain that not all that glitters is Gold, men could afford to date carelessly but will not at any one time risk marrying carelessly for they, surprisingly, can see further than the outside beauty in a woman they choose to spend a lifetime with! He can play along with the charm as the lady thinks he is in some sort of trance or obsessed yet deep down its clear to him that spending a life with her is the greatest mistake he can ever make!!

For the love of the attention, affection and praise, what I choose to call [AAP], the externally beautiful female species will always evolve into bitterness and depression whenever that aspect of their lives goes unnoticed. Consequently, they will, for some reason always repel any man whose shortcomings are in respect to AAP. Since 90% of the men are slow reactors to emotions, I politely imply they end up in as many relationships and cannot afford to sustain even one..woe unto them if this goes on for a lifetime.

The internally beautiful species on the other hand might not have what we the men think we want in a woman in the prime of our youth. The media has excelled in painting what we would call an ideal chic but sadly, there is absolutely nothing they dare to mention on the moral character. Corrupted by a stereotyped image that glorifies the externally beautiful woman, man gets caught up in between the craving to satiate his transient desire for pleasure and the need to acknowledge the emptiness there in of the whole project. The internally beautiful woman thus will normally go unnoticed, though the externally cute one will normally go unmarried.

It takes a while to appreciate a lady that is internally beautiful as she, in most cases, will not have what it takes to catch a man's eye on the outside. However, when she is finally singled out from the many, her inner beauty slowly spills to her outside. As a man, you begin to see it even better than the cosmetically modified one of the externally beautiful woman and...alas, there comes your actual package.

I would thus say a woman that is only externally beautiful is like an empty package wrapped with beautiful ornaments, gold and diamonds..may be roses too...you get her, you get nothing at all...its the art of deception, seduction.

As it is said, when you marry, let it be someone you can talk and share a life with coz wen you are older and have done all there is to be done...talking is all there is between the two of you.

Meen, men, stop writing advice columns..

Dear Walter:

I hope you can help me here. Last Wednesday I set off for work leaving
my husband in the house watching TV - as usual. I hadn't gone more than
a km down the road when my engine conked out and the car shuddered to a
halt. I walked back home to get my husband's help. When I got home I
couldn't believe my eyes. He was in the bedroom with a neighbour lady
making mad
passionate love to her. I am 36, my husband is 40 and we have been
married for fourteen years. When I confronted him, he broke down and
admitted that he'd been having an affair with her for the past six
months.
I told him to stop or I would leave him. He was retrenched from his job
six months ago and he says he has been feeling increasingly depressed
and worthless. I love him very much, but ever since I gave him the
ultimatum he has become increasingly distant. I don't feel I can get
through to him anymore.

Can you please help? I am desperate.
Sincerely,
Mrs. Sheila Y


Dear Sheila:

A car stalling after being driven a short distance can be caused by a
variety of faults with the engine. Start by checking that there is no
debris in the fuel line. If it is clear, check the jubilee clips holding
the vacuum pipes onto the inlet manifold. If none of these approaches
solves the problem, it could be that the fuel pump itself is faulty,
causing low delivery pressure to the carburetor float chamber.


I hope this helps.

Walter

Just married d-day

Your wedding day...one of the days we would evidently single out as the
day-to-remember.

Really?

Lets go to the opinion polls.... my study is more of a Venus village category but thats
just all there was for my sample space..

Results

• 10% of either sex said indeed indeed, it is the most memorable day in life
• 99% of the ladies said its 'their' day to remember..please note, their day!
• 82% of the men lamented, saying its is, if not the longest, one of the longest days in their lives.!

Any statistician could agree with me that there is no need to compare any further.! Its clear that this is the day when, as they say, 'Romeo from mars meets Juliet from...'

Remarks!.. my personal remarks..

There are things that have to happen for a bond to strengthen between two parties, politely addressed as spouses andthe nature of the relationship dictates the terms and conditions, the kind that do not seek either party's subscription.

Yes the man is tormented by the lengthy recitals in the church and oblivious of the commitments he utters out, the flashes from the cameras… ooh those still moments of life when all disagreement is graphically obscured, the smiles of they that supposedly wish you well mixed with those from the backstabbers BUT please recall, the lady is, at this moment, a conqueror...the world must know that she now has 100% exclusive ownership of the man and all that comes with him, her hearts desire, her definition of love is therein being fulfilled...No wonder, just to jolt you into the world of bravery, the ladies love to remind the men, "to marry is to be man enough!"

Life begins to be spent. No longer according your dream but to your dreams.

I would like to take no sides for now but simply drop in a remark or two…I forced to believe the wedding day is probably an all-lady's-day as:

• 90% of the arrangements are made by her, 90% of the payments by him.
• 95% of the decisions and choices are made by her, 2% him, 3% her relatives.
• There is only one peg-boy, 4 flower girls and up to 6 maids.
• Plus a matron..
• The glamour of the day is defined 95% by how smart she was, not he was.
  
• The man normally has a black suit on...often a colour associated with sad moments and the lady, 80% of the time white(a puritans view of purity)
  
  

And hey dear men, did u notice that no one is actually interested in your wedding pictures take a count, thereafter, fill me in on how many male friends show up to reminisce the wedding day in comparison with the female counterparts, who, for the sake of simply not frequenting your home, will purchase 99% of your wedding DVD's and even create special BACKUP COPIES...just incase!!

The end justifies the means...the ladies need it, the men have it so why not make a pact?
Indeed to wed is to be man enough and there is no greater risk.

Where you belong..

we all belong someplace, or even better to someone at one time or another. Daily interaction with people of dissimilar personalities makes it ocular that vultures gather where there is a corpse..

"A man that does not want to be touched by a monkey's tail should not join in their dance!"

Its amazing to learn that the people you have around you have been drawn to you. Like a bee is drawn to a flower, you either have what they like or you are appear like you do. Some will not stick around wen you run out of nectar.Others might stick around cause they haven't found a better option- as yet.
You make more friends with your ears than with your mouth. However, making and keeping are two separate things so we are continously spent by the effort to retain them. Bishop T.D Jakes believes we need not hold on to someone who can live without you cause if they can, what makes you think you can't live without them.

"A false friend and a shadow stay around only while the sun shines"..Franklin

I must conclude with a confession that my 'human theory' needs an update ..a wise man does not waste a muscle to chase a fly from waste...bt if it falls on your food..thats a different thing.!

All done effort keeps ego...